WHAT IS THE VALUE OF HUMANITY AND WHY DO WE SQUANDER IT?

Think about this statement for a moment:

If there was another species on our planet that was as violent to humans as humans are to themselves, we’d hunt it down and bring it to the verge of extinction because that’s what we do – that’s what makes us human.

The utter failure of our existence is that this statement is true – and we all know it.

As a species, we humans squander every gift given us; all our natural advantages.

The human species has three distinct advantages over every other creature on this planet. Firstly, we have a concept of the future – we understand that tomorrow will come, we appreciate our own mortality and we can plan for things before they happen. This connects to our second great advantage, we can make choices. We have the ability to choose to do things by considering our options and making a conceptually informed decision. As such, our third great advantage is that we understand consequences – we can appreciate and accept that our choices have outcomes and we are responsible for those.

These great advantages enable a multitude of other innate gifts that sets us apart from most, if not all, other species. For example, through the gift of choice we have a great capacity for love, compassion, empathy – things we often describe as “our Humanity”. And as much as you might say that these aren’t choices – we do choose them in as much as we have the same ability to choose to hate, ignore and cast judgement.

The values of Western Democracy are premised on our great advantages and the natural gifts they nurture. This is made most evident in the American declaration of Independence that is synonymous with Western Liberal/Christian discourse and its’ belief in our innate ability to take responsibility for our own actions and care for the well being of others:

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness”.

It is from this high moral pedestal that we condemn global non-conformists such as the Islamic world for how they, according to this humane Liberal discourse, choose to live by archaic Medieval values and traditions that are infested by anti-humane sentiment.

Yes indeed, the Western world has established itself as the true pedigree of what it is to be ‘human’ – and we’ve built monuments, towers and bureaucracies to perpetuate this elaborate myth and convince ourselves that it’s all true.

Now I don’t consider myself to be in any way special or different to the people who live and work around me. In fact, I think I’m pretty ordinary. I live in a relatively benign city in a very deliberately benign western democracy. I have a fairly standard three bedroom home in the suburbs where I potter in the garden, host the occasional dinner party or bar-b-que, walk my dogs and watch television. I work in an office environment in what is, for the most part, a standard nine-to-five job. I shop, have the occasional beer, look forward to an annual holiday and I’m proud of my kids.

But I don’t know who any of my neighbours are. I know there are families on each side and at the back – but I have no idea who they are, what they do… what they even look like.

I know very little about the private/family lives of most of my work colleagues and I know they know just as little about me. I’m not even sure if any of us want to know more about each other.

And I trust no-one…

So why is that? Why do I feel as though I am unable to trust anyone? I mean, I’m a good person… aren’t I? For one, I have a profound belief in the notion of Karma; that is, that you get back what you radiate out. In that sense, I try to be honest, forthright, caring and empathetic, loyal and reliable. I believe that if I project these qualities to others – that’s what they’ll give me in return.

But humans aren’t like that, are they? One of my neighbours will always complain to local authorities about my dogs, that my teenager had one party in three years (for which he went around and warned the neighbourhood) and it was too noisy… but no-one never thought to come and discuss their concerns directly with me – in the decent, natural justice kind of way. And amidst my work colleagues there’s those who will always let me down on deadlines so that I look bad, ignore my directions, never lend a hand, engage in and perpetuate office gossip – and they will always be out there trying to belittle me behind my back – and for what purpose?

We kill each other, steal from each other, cheat on each other, lie to each other, perpetrate violence upon each other…

Why are we like that? What is it that enables us to ignore all the good choices we could potentially make and opt for the bad, ugly choices?

Ask yourself – as a species, what kind of footprint is humanity leaving behind? And as an individual, what kind of footprint are you choosing to leave behind?

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OUR CHOICES: THEY CAN HAVE UNLIMITED POTENTIAL OR THEY CAN TIE US DOWN

We all wear Masks.

We wear our Mask in everything we do and every time we communicate with those around us – even those closest to us: our partners and loved ones.

Generally our Mask is made up of our life experiences, our education and our upbringing; and it exists as a representation of how these three factors have shaped our perception of life.

We use our Mask to communicate to the world around us, to radiate a misconception of who we truly are and as such; our Mask becomes our primary excuse for avoiding our responsibilities and not fulfilling our purpose in this life. It becomes something we hide behind.

What would it be like if we could remove our Masks? What would it be like if we could communicate as men from the heart in an inspired way?

Let us look at this a little deeper by asking ourselves; “how can we be truly Authentic?”

The true answer to this can be a little disheartening; we can never be truly authentic – it is an unattainable goal.

However, we can pursue a path that enables us to become more and more Authentic in our Life; to strive for personal growth, to expand our horizons of experience and knowledge, and to aim at becoming the best version of ourselves that we can be. 

But we need to learn how to remove our Mask/s and wear only ourselves so that this becomes the representation of who we are in the world. If we do this, then our ‘True Face’, used in the correct way, can become a powerful tool that we can use to communicate with others, experience massive growth potential and fulfil our own life’s purpose. In this sense, our True Face becomes our primary vehicle of expression.

But even if we are wearing our True Face, our growth and who we continue to be is still determined by our experiences, education and perception of life. In this sense, even our own True Face can become a Mask: a static and false representation of who we are.

Look around you at the most authentic men you know – even they sometimes get caught up in the notion that their True Face is their the sole expression of who they are and that all that they can ever be is stated in that fixed image in time. In other words, even the best of us fall into the trap of allowing our projected selves to be expressed through the misrepresentation of a Mask.

So as much as we strive for authenticity, we must always be aware that if we do not keep ourselves in check, we may only be discarding one set of Masks for another. Therefore, in our eternal quest to be as authentic as we can be; we need to remain vigilant and be aware that the pathway to being authentic is not as straight, narrow and illuminated as we might like it to be.

Our biggest challenge in our quest to be as authentic as we can be is that with every step we take we have CHOICES. This is what sets us apart from all other living things – that as humans we understand consequence and can make choices in relation to those potential consequences. And as much as having the ability to make consequential choices is something that we should embrace as a gift, we should never forget that this gift can limit our possibilities too.

One Men’s Group facilitator I spent time with a while back used to tell us that “Awareness gave us Choice, and this was a great and powerful thing”. In many ways he is right. If we lose our Masks and allow ourselves to masters of our own destiny (in other words, if we become aware) then it stands to reason that we can now make sensible and informed choices about our growth potential – our pathway to becoming our most authentic selves.

The only problem with this position is that it relies on the assumption that in our state of ‘awareness’, we will always make sensible and powerful choices – the right choices. And here lies the problem. Do you see it?

With every choice we make there is a different consequence – and each consequence requires a different response. And how have we always responded to the consequences of our choices in the past? By putting on our Masks.

I’m sorry – the road to becoming as authentic as you can be was never meant to be easy and anyone who tells you it is is misguided themselves.

But while the road is not smooth, straight, narrow and sign-posted; it is not impossible to follow either. We can make choices and still wear our True Face – we just have to constantly reflect upon ourselves and the choices we make; and we should always look to those around us who offer to support us through heartfelt challenge.

In summary, we need to know that:

• Our choices can and do provide new opportunities for growth and change;
• But those same choices can also limit our opportunities for growth and change;
• However, it is not our choices that limit us but rather, the way we respond to them or apply them to our daily lives;
• If we express our choices with our True Face on, the potential for growth and change is limitless;
• If we express our choices behind the façade of a Mask, we inhibit our potential;
• The ultimate choice we have in making our choices is deciding whether we proceed wearing our True Face or a Mask.

Here is a simple rule to help guide you:

Anything expressed through a Mask is superficial

Anything expressed wearing our True Face is sincere, honest, heartfelt and has unlimited potential.

And you do want to make choices that are sincere, honest, heartfelt and have unlimited potential don’t you?